Why I haven’t made any videos

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I decided to take a few weeks off the youtube channel. I thought I would gather my thoughts and come back more prepared and ready to tackle this creative outlet again. I was wrong.

If there is not a plan set in place before the break the days pass by and nothing gets accomplished. Although, I’ve read countless books and articles about the importance of focusing on one thing at a time my habits don’t change.

Once I tell myself that I will concentrate on one particular project my brain begins to be afraid of missing out on the many other projects I choose to not focus on. And in the end, I end up not doing anything. I’ve done this to myself so many times. I sabotage my growth.

I’m afraid of putting the best out there and it not being good enough. That’s why I can’t focus on one thing because if I do try my best and my best sucks then I can’t hide behind the mask of “well I wasn’t giving it my all”. This idea that what I am today is not enough. I hide behind my thoughts and cripple myself by questioning my motives. Telling myself I can’t do it. Putting excuses in front of me. Taking a break from Youtube or from creating doesn’t make me want to create more. It makes me want to create less.

I just have to keep creating, showing up and stop questioning myself so much. But it’s easier said than done. So this month my mantra will be “Done is better than perfect”. I have to repeat this to myself each and every day in order for it to stick in my head. Done is better than perfect.

Creativity, inspirations, knowledge doesn’t only come from reading it also comes from taking action. From putting yourself out there and choosing to be vulnerable. Choose to be excited about what you create.

As I type these words out, I have no clue what I will create tomorrow. But one thing for sure is that I will create something. Because taking a break for me is not how I will grow as a human and reconnect with my inner self. 

I just hope that one day I look back at this time in my life of having my head in million directions and be thankful I’m in a better place.

Let me know if you struggle with this as well. I’d love to know I’m not alone. Has anything helped you? Leave a comment below.

Thank you for reading,

Zulema

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